Development tips

Topic of the month | Being misunderstood

We can all be misunderstood, and some of the reasons are of our own making. Here are the ways each type often gets misunderstood and what people of each type can do to change this.

ONES | being critical of others
Practice breathing into your heart area as you communicate with other people, whether this is in-person, during conference calls or video conferences, or through the written word.

TWOS | having a hidden or unclear agenda in relationships
Be more explicit in communicating what you are offering to do for others and why you want to do it, thus giving the other person the chance to refuse or accept the offer.

THREES | being inauthentic
Spend more time reflecting on what you really think and feel, then be willing to share more of this with others.

FOURS | being self-focused
Minimize the self-referencing words and personal stories to help the focus be on others as well as on themselves.

FIVES | being remote or unfeeling
Breathe more into your heart area instead of breathing primarily into your head and throat area.

SIXES | being anxious or appearing oppositional
Each time you want to ask a question – a “what if” question – pair it with a positive statement about how something could manifest positively.

SEVENS | not listening fully to others
Breathe more often both when you talk and when you listen.

EIGHTS | acting as if they have the real and only truth
Ask more questions in a way that shows your curiosity, and be willing, at times, to share when you are uncertain about what to do.

NINES | being indecisive or unclear
State what you actually think about something, whether verbally or in writing, and apply this to areas in which you agree as well as those areas with which you disagree.

Ginger Lapid-Bogda PhD, the author of seven best-selling Enneagram-business books, is a speaker, consultant, trainer, and coach. She provides certification programs for professionals around the world who want to bring the Enneagram into organizations with high-impact business applications, and is past-president of the International Enneagram Association. Visit her website: TheEnneagramInBusiness.com. ginger@theenneagraminbusiness.c

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