How do individuals of the nine different Enneagram styles react to Facebook?
Although the following information is anecdotal rather than scientific, it is a first step! The data was collected from people who do use Facebook rather than from those who do not.
Included are the following: a brief description of the Enneagram style; themes and quotations about what they enjoy about Facebook as well as what frustrates them; and a brief analysis of how their comments reflect their Enneagram style.
ONES seek a perfect world and work diligently to improve both themselves and everyone and everything around them.
“Connection to the larger world”
“Seeing what friends, both near and far, are doing”
Others’ impolite behavior
“Shocked by people’s disregard for social manners: being publically critical of others, refusing to participate or acknowledge responses, or excessive postings”
Lack of quality conversations
“Doesn’t provide for meaningful connections”
“Can’t have quality conversations and interactions”
The guilt induced
“Not meeting my own standards for regularly connecting with Facebook friends”
COMMENTARY: for the ever-practical and high-expectation Ones, connectivity is the highlight of Facebook, and this is exactly what Facebook is designed to do. Although the Ones actually enjoy Facebook, their frustrations are more numerous and expressed in greater detail, with most of their issues related to features or people – including themselves — not meeting quality standards – for example: how others write on Facebook; the lack of quality conversations; their own internal guilt for not keeping up as they should.
TWOS want to be liked by those they want to like them, try to meet the needs of others, and attempt to orchestrate the people and events in their lives.
“Great way to develop new relationships”
“Keeps me connected with little effort”
“Lovely gift to connect with old friends, even from high school”
Analyzing people and interactions
“Another way of knowing others”
“Fun to observe the dynamics and interactions”
“Glimpses into the lives of others”
Too high visibility
“Dislike being so public and personally visible”
“Friend” request dynamics
“Feeling conflicted with ‘friend’ requests when I don’t know or don’t like the other person”
“Hard to decide who is a friend and who is not; rejecting or being rejected”
COMMENTARY: for the relationship-oriented Twos, the positive and frustrating parts of Facebook focus primarily on people and relationships. For example, Twos like all the connections and interactions, but feel challenged when having to declare themselves to others through visibility or rejecting “friends.”
THREES organize their lives to achieve specific goals and to appear successful in order to gain the respect and admiration of others.
“Stay connected to friends and family”
“Learn about people that I don’t know well”
“Maintain old relationships; develop new ones”
“Like quick updates”
“It’s an aggregation; saves time.”
“Can come in and out based on my business”
“Provides an opportunity to examine how I spend my time”
“A complex time sink”
“People write when they have nothing to say.”
“Prefer Twitter; it’s faster”
COMMENTARY: for the effective, efficient and goal-oriented Threes, Facebook is all about their time — time spent, time used well, and time wasted — with a little bit of self-reflection thrown in.
FOURS desire deep connections both with their own interior worlds and with other people, and they feel most alive when they authentically express their feelings and personal experiences.
Insight in others
“I love to learn more about people I don’t know well.”
“Facebook makes others more visible in my experience so I feel emotionally closer to them.”
“Really like keeping up with people”
“Not sure what to write; should it be poetry, should I post a photo…?”
“Don’t want to say anything too ordinary”
“I hate to be predictable in what I post.”
COMMENTARY: for the dramatic, passionate, and reflective Fours, Facebook evokes strong emotional reactions. They like it and some love it — primarily a result of feeling more connected and closer – but they are also uncertain about it: to whom am I writing, what should I write about, how can I be connected and different?
FIVES thirst for information and knowledge and use emotional detachment as a way of keeping involvement with others to a minimum.
“I observe everything: individuals, interactions, etc.”
“Great way to connect with others on every level thoughts, feelings, emotions”
“Closeness with kindred spirits”
“Expressing myself and listening to others express themselves”
“Didn’t like it at first”
“Avoided it for a while”
“9 times out of 10, I don’t jump in on conversations.”
COMMENTARY: for the cerebral and reluctant-to-engage Fives, Facebook presents a challenge. When should they write, what should they reveal, how long can they delay writing before they miss the moment. However, once they do start writing on Facebook and get the rhythm of doing so, Facebook becomes a safe outlet for engagement and emotional expression. They can observe, express, and react when they want to and to whom they want with a degree of safety and protection. After all, no one is in the room with them insisting they respond.
SIXES have insightful minds, are prone to worry, and create anticipatory or worst-case scenarios to help themselves feel prepared in case something goes wrong. Some Sixes (called counterphobic Sixes) go headlong into risky situations to prove they have no fear.
“Making friends with common interests around the world”
“Finding people I’ve lost contact with from so many places (unless I’ve already removed them from my life – for example, they’ve stabbed me in the back or were not kind)”
“Like chatting with people”
“Do what I need to do for business, but separate my personal page from my business page”
“Too much divulging by others of insignificant information like ‘having coffee now’”
“Some on Facebook seem to crave an audience.”
“Some appear to use Facebook as a substitute for real relationships.”
“Not sure what to share; don’t want to appear boring”
“Don’t some people realize that others don’t care what they say?”
COMMENTARY: for the insightful, incisive, and concerned Sixes, Facebook is paradoxical. They like it and they don’t like it, enjoy the creation of current, new, or renewed groups (tribes) around them and business connecting, but have a long list of specific concerns, things that really bug them!
SEVENS crave the stimulation of new ideas, people, and experiences, avoid pain, and create elaborate future plans that will allow them to keep all of their options open.
“It had to have been created by a 7!”
“It is fun and moves fast!”
“Ecstatic at reconnecting with ‘lost’ friends”
“Wide range of political opinions”
“People have interesting lives.”
“Why do some people tell us everyday what they are doing?”
“Stupid games people play and report about”
“A bit sad that an old girlfriend apparently is carrying a bit of a grudge and won’t answer my ‘friend’ request”
“Cautious about how much to say in public”
“Feels something like a high-school reunion where I don’t remember many people who want to be friends”
COMMENTARY: for the energetic and high-engagement Sevens, Facebook appears as if it were designed especially for them. Its fast pace and ability to convey new information instantaneously is thrilling. At the same time, they can also become very bored with it and feel interpersonally vulnerable.
EIGHTS pursue the truth, like to keep situations under control, want to make important things happen, and try to hide their vulnerability.
“It’s like a community bulletin board.”
“Stay in touch with local and global friends”
“A virtual ‘Main Street’”
“I like the news!”
“Interesting quotes or thought provoking information”
Experience their tender, vulnerable side
“The baby videos”
“Pictures are great”
“Others are very interesting to study”
“Identify talent in surprising locations”
“You can turn it on or off whenever you want.”
“I am in complete control.”
“Only share what you want to share and you block off strangers”
No one listed any frustrations!
COMMENTARY: for the big picture, community-oriented Eights, Facebook is a big plus. In fact, not one of the Eights had anything negative to say about it. Why? Perhaps the answer lies in their strong sense that they can control Facebook at the flip of a stroke. It appears Facebook also offers Eights a way to embrace their tender sides, study themselves and others – many Eights are highly interested in what drives others — and they can do this at any time of their choosing.
NINES seek peace, harmony, and positive mutual regard and dislike conflict, tension, and ill will.
“People just appear on my screen.”
“Such variety and fun”
“Clever lines and humor (I have such clever friends!)”
“Allows for public and private conversations”
“Love the private more in depth mailbox discussions”
“Connecting and reconnecting briefly and easily with friends and family across the globe”
“Great for spreading information about events”
“Links to interesting information”
The Facebook “look”
“Graphics are clumsy”
“Not aesthetic or beautiful”
“Having to give permission for Facebook to use any of your AND your friends information if you take those stupid tests”
“People who fill pages and pages with those tests on a single day”
COMMENTARY: for the harmony-oriented, comfort-loving Nines, Facebook allows them to have rapport with groups and individuals. They can learn interesting tidbits of information, tell others about themselves or promote their activities without feeling they are intruding in any way, and it is easy! Although most Nines do not appear to be unhappy or judgmental during in-person conversations, here they express their annoyance, irritation, and displeasure with certain Facebook features in quite nuanced ways.
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